“I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said, ‘Stop! Don’t do it!’
“‘Why shouldn’t I?’ he said.
“I said, ‘Well, there’s so much to live for!’
“He said, ‘Like what?’
“I said, ‘Well...are you religious or atheist?’
“He said, ‘Religious.’
“I said, ‘Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?’
“He said, ‘Christian.’
“I said, ‘Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?’
“He said, ‘Protestant.’
“I said, ‘Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?’
“He said, ‘Baptist!’
“I said, ‘Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?’
“He said, ‘Baptist Church of God!’
“I said, ‘Me too! Are you Original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?’
“He said, ‘Reformed Baptist Church of God!’
“I said, ‘Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?’
“He said, ‘Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915!’
“I said, ‘Die, heretic scum!’, and pushed him off.”
—Emo Philips
Saturday, August 25, 2007
On divisions in the Church
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3 comments:
Jeffrey! I would say this is hysterical, but truly, it's very sad. Theresa was reading it to me, and halfway through, I totally knew the ending. What was life like when everyone *agreed*?
Dear Jeff,
Blessings.
I appreciate the post. I muse about things a little differently than Tricia. I wonder if there has ever been a moment in the Church when everyone "agreed." Of course, Tricia might intend irony by surrounding "agreed" with quotation marks. If so, her irony is quite pointed.
Peace.
BG
Dear Bill,
On the contrary, there was a time when everyone agreed; it was prior to Genesis 3. There will again be harmony at the end, when sin and death are abolished.
Even in the history of the Church, there have been times where there was at least much more institutional unity than now, and there were benefits to such a situation.
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